Making Progress

I feel like I am somehow making progress in my life.
I have scheduled a surgery that I have been putting off for a long time.
I have tried and failed to understand all that is going on in my life, and so now I am just letting go of the things I cannot change.
I have adjusted my diet to not include so much gluten and have finally accepted the fact that I am growing older and that life is to be enjoyed more than understood.
Things that used to mean so much no longer do, and more and more I am realizing that the more I try to understand how my gift of being a pyschic/medium works, the more I have to accept that it is all energy and not for me to know.
A gift - but oh such a responsibility. I have to keep reminding others that I am the vessel, not the source of the information.
I am seeing the outcome of all the spiritual work I have done with others this past year and a half - with readings and workshops and gatherings and I am so happy to have been a part of all of these.
Again, I am the vessel, not the source.
We have to all do our part... we have to all believe in ourselves...and believe that what we do in the world touches so many others...

Thank you to all of you who believe in spiritual ancestors, Spiritual guidance, and the freedom to believe as you choose.

Monday

So many thoughts running inside my mind this morning.
Up early to take litte Hercules (my fox terrier) for a walk in my litte sanctuary here in Candler. How much longer will I be here to do this, I wonder. Soon, this house and land will belong to someone else. I pray that this person, or persons, will understand how much love and care I have put into this house and acerage for the past nine years.
Will appreciate the deer, the red foxes, the wild turkeys, the crows, ravens, pilated woodpeckers, butterflies, hummingbirds, bats, etc., who have spent time with me here.
So much ceremony has gone into this land; so many wonderful spiritual workshops, readings, gatherings have happened here in this lovely house. And now, I am being asked to move forward.
Where? I don't know for sure yet and this causes a stir in my fear mode. I do trust but I am a woman who wants to know things - and as soon as I type this, I am reminded that timing is everything.

This past weekend has been a weekend of work: staining the deck, clearing out old papers, packing, learning to walk through an empty house. July 4 was also the birthday of my first son, Dustan Paul, who passed to Spirit at the age of 8 months. So long ago but still so fresh in my mind.

I am being told over and over to be grateful. And I am. Being grateful doesn't take away memories, but it does put me back into the moment.

Life goes on and so do I...trusting the unknown until timing reveals the next phase of my journey.