How I Am Feeling Today

This morning (December 18, 2009) as I looked outside, I saw a red-tailed hawk circling, circling, circling in the falling snow.

I went inside, got some tobacco to offer, and realized she was reminding me of a poem I had written several years ago:

Underneath The Hawk’s Scream

I stood underneath the hawk's scream
long enough to know I didn't understand
long enough to know I needed to go deeper

long enough to know that the crows crowding her,
distressing her, tearing at her with their indifference
were there for a reason as were the blue jays quietly listening.

How badly did she want her nest in that tree?
What would she endure to make sure her cries were respected?
Her creations were born?

I stood underneath the hawk's scream long enough to realize
she was not screaming from frustration
she was screaming to be heard

long enough to know she was teaching me how to persevere.
"Carry on!” she shrieked at me.
"You have a right. It came with birth."

(©2005 from Confessions of a Madwoman)


These days, I get so caught up in what I am working on, I forget what has been given to me: all the gifts of writings, teachings, lessons, stories, etc., that I have shared with others. Today, the hawk reminded me of what I have been given, and in essence, reminded me to share these strengths with myself.